Talk:Fade/@comment-33008190-20170221191825

This is good. The length is good and the plot seems sad and believable. I do believe the structure could be a bit more organized, and sometimes it is a bit wordy, and for poems, short and catchy phrases work best. (I've written lots of poetry.)

The end gets a bit repetitive but it does make it more dramatic and defined.

Idk why but the "Fire creed" line is so cool and I love it, so good job on that. Nice songthing foxypoopoo